Thursday, August 20, 2009

Excuse Me, You Have Something In Your Teeth

I've always told my friends that if I ever had anything in my teeth, I'd want them to tell me. I think...if they were really my friends, they would spare me the embarrassment, right? least that's what I hope. I came up with a list of other things I'd want my friends, or anyone for that matter, to tell me if one of these applied to me.

Sure...they can laugh about it at first. People laugh at me ALL THE TIME. But, don't let me go all freaking day with one of these malfunctions.

1) Tell me if I have food in my pearly whites! Spinach, oreos, pepper...whatever.

2) Toilet paper on my shoe

3) Skirt tucked in to the panty hose...I rarely wear panty hose, but this applies to my panties as well.

4) Makapiapia a.k.a. eye boogers. Yuck!

5) Sometimes I wonder, "Can't they feel that they have a booger hanging out of their nose?" Ummm...NO! You can't always feel the booger coming out of your nose, so please, people...TELL ME! It's not embarrassing for you, it's embarrassing for me!

6) I've been known to leave my fly down, so let me know if you can see my undies because my zipper is down.

7) Unbuttoned blouse. Contrary to popular belief, I really don't like my cleavage showing., maybe I don't have cleavage...but still, tell me if I left a button unbuttoned. I'm really super conservative and most likely, I didn't leave it unbuttoned for a reason.

8) I'm really self if I smell like B.O...please tell me. Or garlic, too.

9) I once walked around the office and met with clients all day with my shirt inside out. Don't know how that happened, but it did. Someone finally had the balls to tell me at 5:00 p.m.

10) Wire looking hair growing in not normal places demands serious attention. Please advise if you see any whiskers growing on my face or in my ears.

Mahalo for your kokua!

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